Somebody just wrote:

“I find your honesty

To be attractive

As hell.”

Well, thanks.

Except that 

It’s easier to like it

When you don’t have to

Deal with me

In everyday life.

I work better

As an imaginary character.

You can dress me in fancy clothes

Like a paper doll,

Or imagine me

With a whip

And (vegan) leather boots.

As a real person

I am quick-tempered,

Irrational,

Vengeful,

Loud,

Or unnervingly quiet.

I can hold a grudge for fourteen years

For THAT thing you did.

I have seven false teeth,

And I secretly want to rule the world.