I ask my Canadian friend

If she thinks I’m insane.

“No.”

What can she say?

She’s my friend,

She lives so far away,

She doesn’t witness

This hair-tearing business

Over paper-writing woes

And the coldness of someone

I considered a good friend.

Send for the wailing women!

Here I am

Beating my chest

Until it’s time to eat.

I will never be thin again,

Gone are the times

When rejection meant

Loss of appetite.

I do my laundry

And look for a new man:

1/2 cup Ted Hughes

1/2 cup Egill Skallagrímsson

1 tablespoon Louis C.K.